Original Air Date: January 5, 1953
We’re at 1953! Another 12 months, one other spherical of progress we will undo over 60 years later.
Note: this week’s episode is listed as Episode 19 on Hulu as a result of information are lifeless. It’s truly Episode 14, however that’s solely in line with each main TV archive and movie web site. If you FEEL prefer it’s episode 19, congratulations. You’re our new Secretary of Lucy.
We open on Ricky, speaking with Fred on the telephone. Fred desires to return up and watch the sport with Ricky, however he’s anxious Lucy may thoughts as a result of she’s getting additional in her being pregnant and may not need firm.
Let’s pause right here and mark this second as the primary time Fred has ever been probably the most thoughtful man within the room. Fred is fucking Feminism 101 in comparison with the shit Ricky pulls on this episode.
Nah, Ricky says, come on over! Lucy’ll love having us all there to prepare dinner and clear for.
But see, this was earlier than Google Calendar, and asking would have been a complete ache within the ass. So Ricky’s fairly stunned to search out out he can’t watch TV with the blokes as a result of it’s the afternoon of Lucy’s child bathe.
By stunned, I imply pissed. Ricky is pissed off that his pregnant spouse is about to get consideration.
Lucy does what all of us women have perfected over a lifetime. She finds a method to make it not about her, so she will be able to even have one thing for as soon as.
Lucy: Think of the infant.
Ricky: Well consider me! I lastly get my first afternoon off and I can’t even sit in my own residence and watch my very own tv set.
Ricky has some extent. In just a few weeks, Lucy will likely be sitting over a postpartum sitz bathtub to disinfect her genitals. All that enjoyable! Lucky bitch!
So Lucy tries one other tactic: she reminds him they’re getting all that nice child stuff at no cost.
He sulks. (Stupid child, silly pregnant spouse, all I’ve is a doting household and an amazing job doing what I really like.) SUCK IT UP, BUTTERCUP.
Lucy asks Ricky to take out the trash. He barely represses his man-rage at this indignity. UM WHAT DO YOU THINK SHE HAS TO TAKE OUT.
Ricky: Say, uh, what am I speculated to do for lunch?
Lucy: Oh honey, I simply don’t have time to repair lunch for you. Gee, I forgot all about you.
Ricky: Yeah that’s been occurring rather a lot recently…
And he mopes away.
After the bathe, Ricky comes again in. He most likely ought to have gone to see a therapist, however apparently he simply took extra asshole drugs.
He’s aggravated the infant bought garments. He’s aggravated Lucy is so completely happy (Ricky I’m so excited! I lastly have one thing to do!). He’s aggravated he isn’t again in his personal mom’s womb, the place his bodily wants had been totally met and he mattered to somebody.
After Lucy reveals him the loot from her bathe, he stands there, checks his watch, and says, “Is dinner prepared?”
Fred is available in with an article mentioning Ricky. Except… it’s truly about Lucy “infanticipating.”
Infanticipating appears like ready for one thing with the endurance of a child. In which case, Ricky has a severe case of infanticipation.
He’s tremendous pissed at this level. He’s aggravated she hasn’t made him steak and potatoes. I imply actually, he whines that she hasn’t made him steak and potatoes.
In truth, Lucy purchased the roast however forgot to prepare dinner it. So she affords him a fried egg sandwich which is seemingly like saying “eat my turds” judging by his face.
Ricky: Don’t fear about me. I’ll get by… I’ll get one thing to eat… in some way… someplace.
Cut to Ricky sick in mattress.
Now ballers, I’m not happy with how offended this episode made me. What proper do I’ve? I personally haven’t pushed out a child. But I believe there’s all the time been an assumption in my thoughts that, if I ever did, the strolling ball sack who put that child there would deal with me like a rattling princess.
Ricky takes a distinct strategy. He has dizzy spells, ache in his abdomen. Lucy blames herself:
Lucy: I suppose it’s my fault. I ought to’ve gotten you dinner, expensive, as an alternative of getting that foolish bathe.
Fuckity fuck. Lucy, he’s not a billionaire working for President. What are you getting out of this emotionally abusive relationship?!?!
The physician tells Ricky he’s having labor pains as a result of Lucy is distracted from making him dinner. It’s not a prank – that’s his precise prognosis.
THIS IS REALLY WHAT’S HAPPENING ACCORDING TO THIS SHOW.
Privately, the physician then lectures Lucy about how Ricky has labor pains as a result of he “feels ignored, uncared for.”
Doctor: You know, if there was some method to make your husband the focus, I’m certain your issues can be over.
And then to show how sensible he’s and the way a lot she ought to belief his concept, he blows cigarette smoke onto the pregnant girl.
Lucy and Ethel determine to plan a bathe for Ricky… a person bathe. Of course Ricky and Fred are thrilled – they’ve been on the lookout for an excuse to have a bathe collectively for years.
But the blokes re-name it a stag social gathering as an alternative of a child bathe. Lucy’s fairly bummed concerning the connotations of that (learn: hookers and blow), so she decides to go in disguise with Ethel.
SO LET’S RECAP WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW: Ricky is in a lot bodily ache from HIS WIFE having a child, he has to exit consuming with all his buddies. Like I’m too offended to sort. Like this patriarchal bullshit. Like get me my ladies’s research diploma and assist me take again the night time I’m so fucking performed with this fucking shit.
Cut to: East 68th St. Athletic and Recreation Society.
Ricky is thrilled. A reporter known as and needs to cowl the primary ever “Daddy Shower.” That reporter’ll have to attend just a few years as a result of, dude, that is no bathe. It’s a contented hour for the native MRA group.
All the blokes introduced him presents: beer. Then they make enjoyable of all of the issues ladies say once they get presents: “Oh you shouldn’t have! Oh, simply what I all the time wished!”
Yeah certain, ladies really feel that method about diapers. This episode leaves out the chilly, arduous fact that almost all of us go to child showers to get or obtain actually fucking costly methods to catch, clear, deposit, and in any other case handle mountains of human shit.
Anyway, Lucy and Ethel present as much as “report” on the “bathe.” Lucy appears an terrible lot like Theodore Roosevelt, and I hope she finds it empowering.
But Ricky sees via it.
As the reporter, Lucy asks whose concept this social gathering was, and Fred takes the credit score for Ethel’s concept whereas additionally calling his spouse a battle ax. Then this different POS alt-right troll comes up and tells an amazing story a couple of man who will get up on stage at a cancan present and harasses the performers, and Lucy will get so fucking sick of this misogynist bullshit that she blinds herself together with her personal digital camera flash and wanders out of the room utilizing solely her arms to help her.
Back at residence, Ricky arrives within the bed room with meals, complaining about Lucy’s silly “foolish cravings.”
You know what, Ricky? You shoot a child out your pee gap, perhaps we will discuss. Until then, finest simply sit it out a few episodes.
At the top, Ricky realizes Lucy threw him that man-shower as a result of she thought he wanted consideration. So he pretends to be sick once more and calls for a few of her ice cream.
Proof ladies are stronger than males: I simply typed all of this with each my fists punched via a wall. You attempt that, Ricky.
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